Here’s What You’re Signing Up For.

A Chaotic Newsletter.

A Cry for Help (Kidding…Kinda🥲)

Every week—okay, let’s be real, whenever I remember—you can expect something different. From exclusive behind-the-scenes chaos of content creation to life lessons no one asked for, to midnight ramblings about why there should be a hard cap on millionaire/billionaire earnings (and anything above that cap should go straight to charity, fight me). It’s all fair game here.

I’ll give you 567,727 reasons why capitalism has set you up for failure, complain about technology, tell you when I burnt my beans (or not), and if you’re good, you might even receive an ink-to-paper, handwritten letter from me. (Yes, I still know how to use a pen. Shocking.)

The goal is to build a fun, tightly-knit loving community of people place where FOR ONCE in my life, I actually stick with something. And hey, maybe you’ll be inspired to do the same. Sometimes we’ll ditch the writing and actually talk it out. Other times there’ll be nothing to say, so I’ll just send woosh woosh wooshas and you’ll be on your way! Actually, just jump over all of this. I wrote it during the pandemic, and must have been high on misheveve).

But seriously. Every now and then, I’ll check in with you. And I’d love if you can respond and check in with me too. We’ll catch up. We’ll laugh. We’ll cry. Mostly cry. Because life is chopsticks. And we’re the noodles hanging on for dear life!

So… are you in, OR are you in?

Also, I used to be a YouTuber BUT…

I was inconsistent and unserious. Also capitalism has had me in a headlock. The channel is currently on life support, collecting dust—just like your unattained dreams, because you, too, are inconsistent and unserious.

But…

Now that you’re subscribed (you DID subscribe…right? 👁️👄👁️ RIGHT?), I’ll see you a lot more often in your GMs! You know, as in DMs but for Gmail? Because this is a newsletter? That lands in your inbox? No? Not funny? Okay, I’ll just see myself out. 🚶🏾‍♀️

Also, full disclosure: this newsletter is sponsored by stress, sleep deprivation, and multiple failed attempts to unbig my back. As a subscriber, you get aVIP co-pilot seat to the effects of all of that and more!

No FOMO necessary, every unhinged edition of this newsletter will come directly to your inbox!

Note to self (Feb 2025): Now that this is no longer a weekly newsletter, I should probably change its name to something less consistent. Should I bring back Unbroken Noodles? Send me money if you agree. 🤲🏾